Killing My Little Darlings


The advanced reviews on Ballad are beginning to trickle in. 

I am getting some fabulous criticisms and difficult as it is for me, I am trying hard to listen. Chapter three always seemed like a loner to me- somewhat out of place and a significant detour from the narrative. I liked it for what it was- a stand-alone dream sequence. However, a few of my beta readers early on expressed their confusion over it- why it was there, what it represented, the point of it at all. Many readers became disoriented from it. Although I loved the "story inside the story," I debated myself whether it really added much to the book, or if it was just too wayward.

One of my professional reviewers, a respected psychologist and author herself, had this to say:

"About Chapter 3:  I think it erodes the trust of the reader when you go suddenly in such a different direction. I felt really confused; Thought my kindle had gone offline! The reader may not continue. What a loss! 

Remember the editor’s famous quote to authors who write something they absolutely love and don’t want to delete; the editor counsels, 'kill your little darlings'.”  

So I did. I killed my chapter 3. Six thousand words, worked so hard on, toiled over for weeks...but it didn't play nice with the other chapter-darlings. So I sacrificed it, pulling it from its place between pages 67 and 87. Although now in hibernation, I believe it will awaken some day and arise to be its own standalone short story. But for now, it's shelved.

Only through my growth in the very recovery I write about was I able to tolerate this massive edit. I reached out for the help of others, and others responded. And this was good. I am at peace with it. Pretty soon the book will be up on Amazon and other sites without (the old) Chapter three. 

That same critic had this to say about my book:

"After reading an advance copy of JDs book, I’m amazed by its quality, expressiveness and honesty. The language is so vivid that it reads like a novel, and I could not put it down. 

This is no typical sobriety book because its tale is told with humor and  candor, while still spelling out the gruesome and deathly aspects of alcoholism. 

You know at the beginning that he hit some kind of awful bottom, but you don’t find out exactly what happened until the end. The story goes on to describe in detail how he experienced the culture of hope in treatment centers, transitional housing, and Alcoholics Anonymous.  

Most important, you have a front-row seat into the thoughts and emotions of of how JD overcomes the most heart-wrenching losses through his gradual spiritual growth. 

If you were going to offer a book on alcoholism to anyone struggling with the disease, I would highly recommend this one. It is more comprehensive and entertaining than any other book of its nature. 

Gigi Langer, PhD 
50 Ways to Worry Less Now
Winner: 2018 Indie Excellence Award
FB. Gigi Langer Author


SO....I listened to her, and I believe the final product is now as good as I can make it. If I went through it again, I'm sure I could edit even more- a better adjective here, improved sentence structure there...but I could probably do that an infinite number of times; I cannot make perfect the enemy of great.

So I killed my "little darling." It stung, but the book will come out as the best I could offer.
Acceptance and gratitude...;-)




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