Rearview Mirror

Twenty Days. 

It took a year to write. It took six months to edit, and three to promote. Ballad of a Sober Man: An ER Doctor's Journey of Recovery has been up for sale twenty days.

 It made the front page of my local newspaper. Saturday was the big book reading with Amber and her book of poetry under the autumn color of the Virginia Blue Ridge. There was music, food, and and fellowship. I sold books. The river of texts was flowing fast. My friends helped with the celebration, and I continue to surpass my expectations of sales online.

Funny though, I'm ready to put it all behind me. In the rearview mirror.

In the experience timeline of any project, there seems to be the concept, the fantasy, the work, the implementation, the process, the buildup, the moment of release, the celebration, the self-congratulation.

I am now experiencing the aftereffects...the reflection, and even, in to a certain degree, the subtle hangover.

This morning I took out a large cardboard box and stuffed it full of bookmarks, bookplates, leftover thank-you cards, and other random Ballad paraphanelia. And it felt good. I now have a clear kitchen table for the first time in months.

Even wonderfully positive experiences need closure. 

I thought, I wrote, I revised, I promoted, I celebrated. I am feeling strongly now that it is time to move past, to close the book on the book, if you will, and seek out my next blank page.

The dust settles and I sit here, writing this blog post, 1453 days sober, still an ER doc. I will still go to my job. I will continue to write to my children. I will still take the dog on runs, have dinner with friends, play guitar, and see my special people.

 I will always have the book, which now, happily, sits large in my rearview mirror. I know as the days pass and more of them pile up between this moment and the book's fifteen minutes, every time I look, it will grow smaller in my field of view. And thats OK. The book is my past, and I have a mellow, satisfactory sensation of completion. 

Thank you.

Thank you for being part of it.

JD

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